Smarty pants

Wife: "Harry! Harry! Wake up! I just heard a mouse squeak!"

Husband, drowsily: "What do you want me to do - get up and oil it?"

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"Herbert," said a mother to her six-year-old son, "are you teaching the parrot to cuss after I asked you not to?"

"No way! I was just telling him what NOT to say."

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Mama Gnu was waiting for Papa Gnu as he came home for dinner one evening. "Our little boy was very bad today," she declared, "I want you to punish him."

"Oh no," said Papa Gnu. "I won't punish him. You'll have to learn to paddle your own gnu."

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Traffic Cop: "Miss, you were doing seventy miles an hour!"

Proud Blondie: "Oh, isn't that splendid! And to think I only learned to drive yesterday!"


If laughter, love and compassion fill your home,
your children will always return.

Debbie